Full Fixture Information

Result Descriptiom

Won by six wickets

Man of the Match

Mark Davis - 76 no

Champagne Moment

Will Oscroft - brillaint bowling spell

Teddy Bear Moment

Rupert Smith - cheese and ketchup? really!

Full Match Report

An ode to Andrew

When Andrew Michael Joly de Lotbiniere asked me to write this report, I took it upon myself to canvas opinion, a wee survey monkey was sent to players past and present. I feel I should redact the names of the responders; although as you read, ideas will no doubt formulate in your mind, here goes?

?When Andrew first arrived on the scene, I thought who is this ponce with his silly bloody name, nothing has changed?
?I always had a bit if a thing for Clare. Why would she marry him, when there was such a fine assortment of stud muffins in the village?
?That is and will always be my Grandad?s house. I hope he knows he is but a caretaker?
?Why is he always so fecking nice, it?s not natural?
?Is he related to that geezer off university challenge?
?When he starts smoking forty a day, going out to bat after ten cans of cheap lager, and supporting a football team from the northeast with a striped shirt, only then can he truly be called a villager?
?That guy couldn?t win a tug of war against my Mum?

Anyway, thank you all for your responses, all highly considered, it?s that last one I thought I?d hone in on.

Six Sunday games played thus far this season. Andrew, as new skipper, has been at the helm for five of them. The results you ask? Three losses and two draws. Ollie at the helm for one, ten wicket win. Pure coincidence or something more deep rooted I hear you ask, let?s delve a little deeper into the psyche of the captain?

I thought perhaps to draw comparison to captains past and present:

Nemo ? mmm, have we been plunged to all new depths?
Mannering ? bumbling, lost the respect of the troops
Hook ? ?In the play, it is implied that Hook attended Eton College and Balliol College, Oxford,and his final words are "Floreat Etona", Eton's motto. In the novel, Hook's last words are a similarly upper-class "bad form", in disapproval of the way Peter Pan beats him by throwing him overboard. He also has a yellow blood disorder. The book relates that Peter Pan began the ongoing rivalry between them by feeding the pirate's hand to a crocodile. After getting a taste of Hook, the crocodile pursues him relentlessly, but the ticking clock it has also swallowed warns Hook of its presence.? One wonders who that crocodile may represent and whether Andrew was cognisant of the ticking of that clock?
Jack Sparrow ? One is left pondering if another loss would have driven Andrew to the rum and away from the razor?
Edward John Smith ? Full steam ahead, we do it my way, icebergs this far south, don?t be daft

Oh goodness, that really hasn?t helped. Let?s instead visit what happened in the Meon yesterday?

Westbourne. An old foe. And an old foe that can call upon some pretty decent cricketers.

Dear old Bunny had warned us that the wicket may be a wee bit spicy, and so it proved. Andrew lost the toss (mmm, Andrew lost you say), we were put into the field. To get this out of the way? your author (AW) was asked to keep wicket, having done it only twice before a few seasons back. It?s a pretty thankless task when the wicket is flat, it?s a feckin awful task when it?s not. And yesterday it really was not. I think the highlight may have been the ball that went about twenty foot above my head. Or perhaps the shooter that avoided cricket boot and cricket pad and instead chose ankle bone. Anyway, enough about me, back to Andrew?

Sticko did what Sticko does. A lovely tight line from the top and rewarded with the wicket of an opener.

From the bottom end Wayne found a great deal of swing but his length was somewhat wayward.

The Warrenator was at the crease, we were all too aware of the 180 odd he hit against us a few years back. Would the bowling change prove pivotal? Ollie came on from the top end and bowled a brilliant spell. Bloody nightmare for the batsman and for the keeper; same gentle run in each time but using that farmers shoulder the ball would either reach the other end of the wicket at about 300mph and still gaining momentum only to be followed by an inswinging dibbly dobbly. Two of the dib dobs bowled a few of their best bats. One of the exocets got the outside edge of Warren?s bat but alas went in and out of your authors right glove diving to his right (very hurty finger as he types).

Sticko invited a friend to play. We?d been told he could play. Turns out that was accurate. Will replaced Wayne up the hill and bowled an incredibly consistent spell of line and length, taking a few wickets, including Warren. Very impressive stuff.

Mark came on but his length was wayward, 28 off his three. Josh bowled three tight overs and Andrew the same, taking one wicket.

Sole had declared early doors that he should bowl, and it was at this juncture that Andrew decided to bring him on. Sole called it, four wickets later and Westbourne were all out for 193.

Is it me or do the tea?s get better and better with each passing week? If we carry on at this rate, we may need to apply for an AA rosette (I work with Simon (the MD), I?ll have a chat).

Now, 193 is a pretty decent total with the wicket playing like it did. Ollie and Tim L went out to face and got us off to a great start before Ollie dabbed a rising ball straight to Warren in the slips. Cometh the hour, cometh the Mark. In at three and clearly intent on getting the job done. Ably supported by Tim to start with (21) and then Rupert S (33). Our debutant, Will, added a swashbuckling 9. And with four overs to go and seven an over required can you guess who came to crease. Yep, el capitano. Here we are, the stage is set, a first win under his captaincy is there for the taking. It was a nervy affair! But a couple of critical boundaries by Andrew in the penultimate over meant we went into the last needing four. A single taken, three required. How fitting (especially for your hurty author) that the winning runs came from a ball that pitched on a length and reared up to about three times the keeper?s height an on to the boundary.

My goodness, a win for the Meon. A win for Captain Andrew Michael Joly de Lotbiniere. He walked off the field with a dazed look on his face, incredulity I believe. Repeating the words ?we won? with it sounding like a question rather than a statement. The face I?m guessing was reminiscent of the early hours of Christmas 1979 when lovely, little, innocent Andrew reached into the stocking and pulled out that oh so perfect walnut, followed no doubt by a slightly infirm satsuma.

Mark was the hero of the hour, a brilliant knock of 76 that broke the back of the Westbourne bowlers.

Champagne moment was awarded to our debutant for that bowling spell. Will if you get to read this, we very much hope to see you grace the hallowed turf once more.

There could only be one teddy bear moment. Dear old Rupert (Smith) was not aware of the historical significance behind the cheese and ketchup sandwiches and fell hook, line and sinker to Sticko?s bait. Although, not a single beautifully cut cheese and ketchup triangle remained come the end of tea. Suffice it to say I won?t mention this particular culinary delight to my AA colleague.

Only one way to end this. Back we must go to Andrew. Back we must go to revisit those captains that have inspired us all?

Kirk ? are we perhaps boldly going where no man has gone before?
Nelson ? (remember the Masters in Maritime History ? in order to get to the rank of Admiral One must traverse that of Captain) East Meon expects that every man will do his duty

Andrew, yesterday was your day. The Andrew way came good. It was a pleasure to witness, to see that smile of five-year-old Andrew beaming across that face. You Sir, are the very best of men and we are oh so lucky to have you.

To finish, a quote from Walt Whitman, as made popular in the Robin William?s classic?

?O Captain! my Captain! our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weather?d every rack, the prize we sought is won?